JAWing On – Life on Okinawa

What have you, as an individual, contributed in the past 10 years? 5 years? lately?

There is a saying “If you don’t want to hear the answer, don’t ask the question.” If answers are forthcoming and honest, then could it be said that those who do not ask questions or do not want questions asked are not willing to face the answers?

Being just a wife with virtually no background in business or political science formal educations, sometimes the ironies of life can raise interesting questions. Such as, how is a hostile takeover of one business by another business group different than “civilized” warfare? Whereas a business is equivalent to an independent country, the CEO equivalent to the leader of a country, the Board of Directors being a War Panel, chief investors being officers, average investors being citizens, and customers being tourists.

What is it with a culture that can’t stand to see two people who are in love and happy being with one another and with their lives? Is it that the people of that culture are so miserable in their own lives that they can’t stand to see anyone else happy?

In social psychology we learned that no act of altruism is done without some form of reward resulting, albeit some motives for reward are more obvious than others. Americans have the saying “Beware of wolves in sheep’s clothing.” Is there a similar phrase in the local dialect?

Do you believe one can understand another’s values by observing behaviors towards other things in the environment?

One of the more unusual questions I’ve been asked by a local male while tending the bar at the club was, “Is being married to an Okinawan man better?”

I didn’t think this question could be answered honestly without an in depth discussion. Given the situation, being asked while I was busy at work, I also found it to be somewhat a leading question. So I just smiled.

If I had had enough time I would have explained that given that I have only been married once I have no point of comparison. Also, I married my husband for the person he is not because he is from Okinawa. I wouldn’t still be with him 31 years later and working with him every weekend for the past eight years if I didn’t like the person he is. Has it always been a smooth marriage? No, we even went through three separations. But given that we only dated each other 6 weeks prior to our engagement and were married 6 weeks after that, there were many unknowns to be worked out. Furthermore, the Okinawan divorce rate is the highest in Japan (the last time I had been informed of the rate it was similar to the American rate and stood at 50 percent), so I do think we are one of the lucky couples that was able to overcome the cultural differences in the expectations of what a marriage was as well as stereotypical images we had of each other’s cultures.

Do you believe philosophical “mumbo jumbo” can replace personal experiences?

If you want a “Big Mac” do you go to KFC for dinner? Do you think being intoxicated will change the KFC menu into a McDonald’s menu?