Oprah had a very interesting topic on today. It concerned the interracial relationships of African American females and non-African American males. I guess there’s a new movie that approaches the still uncommon subject.
As a female who chose a mate outside of the stereotypical demographics, I offer these comments for others to contemplate:
1) I didn’t choose my mate as an act of disgruntled abandonment of my “race” or “culture”. I chose this man because of who he is. If prior to meeting my husband, I had met some other male with the same attributes as my husband and we hit it off (as my husband and I did), then I probably would have ended-up with that person. But that’s not what happened.
2) Maybe I got all the “dream” stuff and Rosa stuff wrong. As a person who grew-up in the ’60s, I took the dream to be one of accepting and respecting people for who they are, regardless of race, gender, or culture. To me that means, taking a close look at the character of an individual instead of the outward image of each person. I don’t remember it having anything to do with, “that’s unless it’s outside of a specified race or culture.”
3) Any one of us is a minority under given circumstances. I have been living the life, and tribulations, of a minority for most of the past thirty-three years. (I am a white, American woman, married to a Japanese national, and we reside in his home territory of Okinawa, Japan.) For the majority of that time I have had no association with the DOD, but have been a registered alien resident and lived within the local culture.
4)The only time couples who are in these atypical relationships seem to have abnormal marital difficulties is when other people outside of the relationship seem to think they have a right to interfere in a personal relationship that has nothing to do with them. In other words, except for difficulties caused by a few really looney zealots, that don’t have any say in a couple’s personal life, other people’s prejudices and hang-ups are theirs. Don’t let their personal baggage become yours.