JAWing On – Life on Okinawa

What is going through the minds of people who throw trash onto a road or place it on the road divider? I assume they clear their vehicles of trash to keep a clean personal environment. So they must think the rest of the world should have to deal with their personal trash! Not only is it an eyesore to see cans, bottles, and plastic containers strewn all over the place, on Okinawa it is a driving hazard. With the strength of the winds that accompany the all too familiar tropical cyclone systems, the trash inevitably gets blown all over the road. Cars constantly have to swerve to avoid these unsightly hazards. Is it really that difficult to use an appropriate trash receptacle?

Women who have to talk to other women’s husbands about their personal lives! I don’t know a simple way of putting it. There are some women who use their femininity to cause havoc in other women’s marriages. I’m not talking about mistresses, but women who don’t like the wife of a person so instead of being direct with the wife they don’t like, they do things to cause arguments between the couple. One of these is to be obvious by pursuing the passive/aggressive manner of “innocently” being flirtatious with the physique- hugs, hands all over the husband when they talk, etc. But the more damaging way is to “innocently” approach the target woman’s husband about personal troubles the aggressing female has with her current partner. All I have to say on this matter is:

1) If you have been putting-up with and complaining about dishonesty and abuse for year after year-quit whining!
2) You are a little girl not a woman-women take the matter to the source – you are the only one who has the power to change it!
3) Grow-up-very few true marriages are going break-up over such trivial nonsense.

These little girls might be successful in causing a small degree of disharmony between the couple, but mature women can see between the lines. If the married woman truly loves her spouse, she won’t allow the antics of these childish females to destroy her marriage!

Tipping on Okinawa is usually reserved for businesses frequented by Americans. I tell my regulars that I don’t think it is necessary to tip. If a customer does decide to tip, it is supposed to be in gratitude for good service rendered, not a bribe for special treatment in the future. Yet some people try to claim that I should provide them special treatment because of the amount of tipping they have done. The usual claim is that they have tipped over one hundred dollars in the previous month.

1) People should have a realistic idea of how much the service person makes in tips prior to making such a claim.
2) A service person usually knows exactly who does the tipping and approximately how much.
3) Not all service persons can be bribed into doing what is disadvantageous to the equal and fair treatment of all customers.

Throughout life one runs across people who never seem to mentally graduate from High School. You know the type of person who has nothing interesting going on in their personal life, so their conversations are limited to gossip and dogging other people. The topics usually include comments on another person’s:

1) Personal appearance: unless you are going to be involved with the person on a romantic level – who gives a doggie’s doodoo!

2) Behavior: whether sexual or other, again unless you are going to have sex with the person or the behavior is disruptive or rude to you or others – who gives a doggie’s doodoo!

3) Belief system: hey we all have one, who are we as one individual to condemn personal beliefs of everyone else in the world, unless that belief leads to harm or personal difficulties.

My system of determining whether or not someone is blowing smoke is simple:

1) Is the situation of any importance, in other words, will the topic make a difference in whatever is being held to ridicule.

2) Does the comment include a solution to the situation or is it just a statement of what the speaker personally disagrees with.

3) What would I do if I were in the person being held to ridicule’s shoes? Is the person being ridiculed being unreasonable in the given circumstance? It’s easy to just make blank negative comments about someone, but if I would react the same way in the given circumstance, to condemn the behavior is nothing more than hypocrisy.

So to those who can’t get past ridiculing others, GET A LIFE!!!

Each week we have people who try to use the club as their personal repayment bank. These people try to bring in a snack or soft drink for employees out of “‘friendship” and then expect a free drink as repayment. First, if you give someone a present out of friendship, it is suppose to be with no strings attached. Otherwise it’s not a gift. Second, we do not pay other people’s’ personal debts. If a favor is done for someone, it is their responsibility to pay their own debts, not ours. If they owe a debt, they can always pay it back their self and shouldn’t expect us to pay it for them! If an employee owes someone a drink, then they can always buy a drink for that person. Taking a beer from the club stock is not the same as paying back a debt. It is the same as us paying the employee’s personal debt.

Why do some people insist on using the phrases “I didn’t know” and “I’m sorry” as a passport to get out of jail free. Every week I deal with adults who perform behaviors at the club that a ten year old knows is inappropriate. Such as spitting on the floor, doing back flips or karate kicks, running at full speed in the club, jumping on couches, trying to sing in the microphone (It is not a karaoke bar!), jumping on stage and trying to play the band equipment at break time without asking the owner of the equipment, standing on the bar stools and tables, etc. etc …
When told to refrain from these behaviors I inevitably get “I didn’t know” or “I’m sorry” as a response. Well “I’m sorry” but people know better than to behave in such manners by the time they’re adults and catch phrases are not acceptable excuses for rude and outrageous behavior. If you are going to have to say you’re sorry for something than you know better than to do it in the first place!

Why do some people think that grabbing or popping someone is going to increase the attacked person’s hearing capabilities? There are many situations where the noise level is so high that it is almost impossible to hear what a person who speaks softly or unclearly is saying. For a culture that is not suppose to be physical in their public communications, there are a large number of people who think grabbing the listener is going to help. For me, being popped or grabbed is a distraction from what is being said, because being physically assaulted draws my attention away from the speaker’s statement!

Okay, what is it with people who seem to be totally oblivious to other customers who were there before them? The locals seem to be really bad at this one! Every weekend I get any number of reactions when I have to tell these inconsiderate people to wait their turn. Do they really think that their particular desire for a beverage is greater than the that of the other people who are patiently and politely waiting their chance to place an order? Do they really believe that acting like a little brat, by slapping the counter, yelling “Hey”, or even trying to come behind the counter is going to ingratiate thier presence in my eyes. Does it really have to be necessary for me to point out that they are being rude to the other persons that are there before them? Do they really, really think I enjoy interrupting service to other customers, it isn’t going to get them their order any faster!!!

Ahhhh, Monday morning and another weekend is over. As we begin our 11th year at the club, and my 8th year working there, certain customer behaviors never fail to amaze me. Each week I will list the main nonsensical behavior confronted on Okinawa.

Really!!!-Pet Peeve of the Week #1:

This past weekend the main ongoing nonsensical norm was individuals who think it’s their given right to bring in their own beverages. What drinking establishment is going to allow that to happen, really!!! I suppose they think they should be able to bring their own food to restaurants too! Not only do they try to bring in their own beverages, they become indignant (even confrontational) when told that no outside beverages are allowed. These aren’t one-time incidents, it’s the same people trying repeatedly to do the same thing, sometimes on the same night. If they honestly believe that this is a proper practice, let them open their own club. I bet it would be the most popular club in town, for the brief duration of its existence!

In other local news, Okinawa is hosting the annual Peaceful Love Rock Festival this week. Bands throughout Japan will be flying-in for the event, which is to be televised and broadcast over the internet at later dates. The week is full of local band practices, with each band trying to throw together a brief highlight of the tunes that make them popular with the locals. In hopes of expanding their fan bases, visiting bands contact all the club owners to book brief guest appearances at each venue and try to gain as much exposure to the locals as possible. And as the final days approach, ongoing incessant sound checks. Oh yes, Peaceful Love week is always a challenge that culminates is two days of exploding music.